Critiques Needed! What am I doing wrong ? #roastme

HorizonDweller 2017-05-10 13:07:46 UTC #1

Sooo... for the las weekly challenge ( btw thanks to all of you that voted my entry and thanks for keeping this website alive) i did some thumnails while developing the idea, even though if i chose "Midas' suicide" this one was one of the favorites when i posted in my art blog and as I said, here I am, developing this one as well. now i want you guys to give your opinion , doesnt matter how good or bad it may be, im used to be taken down lol.
these are opportunities for me to grow and realise some of the mistakes i make or what i could do better.
this is a work in progress so i may bost updated versions soon but it is already at a pretty advanced point so ... i cant wait to hear what you have for me.
have no mercy

roast me

exofley 2017-05-10 16:54:30 UTC #2

Hail Horizon Dweller, It is I, Sir Knight of Cubebrush! I have come to roast thou with no mercy! .... Okay not really, but thanks for helping me out with my work I couldn't help but check out yours as well. so lets cut the chatter and stir the batter shall we?

Space and lighting

I just want to start of with saying the composition, texture and color harmony seems on point right now (though I think some green would be great, but will talk on that later) Something I found a bit distracting is how close this necromancer or spell caster is close to the back-round
I know the piece is still in the W.I.P stages however, I believe depth in this illustration will be one of your biggest adversaries. Your illustration makes me feel a bit claustrophobic in that aspect.

( I have another class I have to head to now but alas, I shall return. I'll be back later today or maybe tomorrow I hope you the best my fellow art warrior.

HorizonDweller 2017-05-10 17:10:13 UTC #3

Ave legionarivm, here under Scipion's helmet I thank you for you patience and time,
you just made me realize the hard time i'm gonna hard at adding depth to this piece, as for the bacground i was thinking of adding some scenarios worthy of Odd nerdrum or Agostino Arrivabene's work ( to me the only true and last old great masters still alive)
Claustrophobia and axiety are feelings i often portray but i try rendering them with content not with mistakes so thats something to work on for me .... i also just realized i have to fix the nose.
I thank you once again brave paladin of the arts, I hope we shall keep contact and mutual constructive feedback
have a nice class

HorizonDweller 2017-05-11 00:07:23 UTC #4

update !

Watercolour 2017-05-11 00:22:58 UTC #5

That's amazing! Your profile says you're in high school, really?!

The only thing that seems off to me is that the brightest part (the pages) is too close to the side edge and the book corner is juust a little cropped. I think your composition will be better if you add a little more width on the left so that edge is in frame and that bright focal point has a bit more space to breathe.
The "hair" looks strange right now, but I suppose you're still working on it.
But it's really amazing, I love the contrast.

HorizonDweller 2017-05-11 03:14:11 UTC #6

Hey @watercolour , thank you in advance for taking the time to look at my stuff and leave your thoughts, the answer to your question is yes, I am 18 years old and in my senior year but I work as an illustrator whenever I can.
Now, thanks for the feedback, tomorrow at first light I will be fixing that corner and adding some space, it would definitely help. About the hair, could you be more specific In what do you mean ?

Watercolour 2017-05-11 11:09:23 UTC #7

I wish I could do stuff half this good when I was eighteen XD

About the hair - what I meant is everything else in your painting is decently detailed and it is clear what you meant to do, and the hair stands out as not-as-finished to me. I can see it's not supposed to be regular hair, but I can't tell if it should be like a tangle of roots or wires or worms. I just think it needs more detail maybe. Could be I just don't get it
Hope this helps more.

HorizonDweller 2017-05-11 12:49:34 UTC #8

Ohhh, get what you meant , they are external venous ramifications, that's why they look like tubes , yet I shaped them like red fire corals so that gives the overtangled look , maybe I should add more texture

HorizonDweller 2017-05-11 12:52:06 UTC #9

Thanks for making me notice I thought I was done with it but nope 😂 It always can be done better

exofley 2017-05-11 14:38:22 UTC #10

Alas I have returned! And I see we have a new visitor aye? well that's just great! Anyways there was something I wasn't able to talk to you about yesterday and this was......

Lighting

I think you've done a great job with the lighting in this piece but there are some parts like the ravens on his shoulder that bother me. There really blending into the back-round and honestly I don't believe it's helping at all with the depth problem your having at the moment. I just wish the ravens where more prevalent in this piece! I just feel that if there's light reaching the cheek bones of his face then the ravens would also need more light!

( It's pretty cool to see that your also a high-schooler as well! it's also my senior year in high-school! keep up the great work man can't wait to see how for you can push this piece!)

By the way I love the soft touch of the green amulet and whatever dark greenish things are in the back. (they kinda look like trees, This setting you have reminds me of a neither realm type feel)