Mermaid illustration

[dzeljka]

here's a new sketch for something i'm hoping to finish by the end of the month, even tho i have only weekends to work on it
sketch is a bit chaotic so let me explain
i wanna capture a fantastic creature in a seemingly mundane setting and behavior, in this case her sleeping in a wrecked fisherman's boat
this will also be my attempt at a night scene and i'm looking forward to finishing it

let me know what you think

[echoriel]

hi! I like the sketch so far and the idea
There is something off in the composition but I can't figure out exactly what... so to me, personally, it feels like there is too many things in top left corner that It drags my attention to it way more than to the mermaid.
I don't know if you are planning to put there something important or not.. but if the main point of the attraction is the mermaid herself then I'd move the entire sketch tiny bit lower and to the left.
Hope it helps and I'm looking forward to see this in colours!

[dzeljka]

hey echo! thanks for the input
i agree with what you are saying, i feel like it is pulling me to expand the scene a bit to the right and balance it out a bit with that chaos on the left
also it might be too crammed in this format?
the sketch is not the best, it's a bit chaotic, but i'll have more values range around mermaid, and more elements to lead the eye to her

i quickly expanded the scene, what do you think?

[echoriel]

Hello again
Well, from my perspective this one could work only if you add sumth rly important to this left part ofthe seashore. And maybe her arm will be hanging towards that object so our eyes could travel back and forth.
I think what you could try is to look for artworks (of well known artists, or illustrators that work in cg industry) that have centered point of attraction or the one that is more to the side.
Also I'd recommend you to check out this video it might be helpful (it should start from the beginning)

I am not super good at this but I would expand your piece more like this.. because otherwise if you chop it shorter it also has that feeling that it is cropped out piece of a bigger picture. But again maybe that's just me
But ye, it is up to you and Im looking forward to see with what solution you will come up

[dzeljka]

Yes, that is it! i thought it felt waaay too close.
Thanks Echo, a lot! also that video is amazingly helpful

[dzeljka]

life is hell-ish busy, i feel bad i can only commit to this in small stolen moments between work or just deep into the night when my mind has already fell asleep
BUT i am nibbling at this slowly, layed down some colors and i kinda like it. well, this part at least

[dzeljka]

nibbling further

[echoriel]

ooh it's shaping up! I like the mood that colours are dictating so far.
I like how u solved this composition problem! keep it up :3

btw is it mermaid for like Mermay thingy??

[dzeljka]

well, all thanks to your help!

ahah no, it didnt rly occur to me to do it for mermay, it's just happy coincidence i guess.
but now i also want to actually do some mermay sketches when the time comes? will see

[dzeljka]

this month was hectic, glad i got to bring this to an end

[echoriel]

this is gorgeous !
love this hue shifts that you have in here
good work!

[dzeljka]

thank you! <3
it's not at the point where i can say i am overly pleased with it tho, i'll probably go back to it eventually and work some more on it
but working on a night scene was truly an experience xD