Nice to see you at least drew a little, it's great way to keep the momentum going!
I think that would be my main critique, the lips are too thick. Also try to pay close attention to the varying shapes of the lips. You did great with getting the basic shapes in your first drawing, but when you use references try to see the difference between the basic structure and lips on real people.
In this ref you can see the bottom lip is a lot more curved than square, the lips are very thin, and, like you mentioned, there's a good amount of space between the bottom edge of the lip and end on the mouth.
Can't wait to see more!