The values of the clouds and trees are a little dark and they are blending in with the values of your tower making is appear a tad flat. Therefore making it not as strong as your original composition.
To illustrate that point I played with the clouds and trees and tower. It's your original composition thumb next to your current in black and white with quickie b/w paintover as example. (Just imagine your birds back in there)
The perspective issue I think is only at the top of the tower. I made ellipses and a whole grid and it all checked out except for the roof. The shadow of the tower also seems inconsistent but don't hold me to that it could be you were trying some fill light. Here's what I mean a little more close up.
The colors...I dont know. You've got some Piotr color style there with subtle pinks and blues. Piotr's stuff is all super gestural and very very painterly and seems alive because of that fact. He's a master of subtle cool and warm and I think you did a good job trying to capture that. I would personally take out that blue tinge that you have because its making things look a little green, but that's just me.
Honestly I think you've done a great job. Don't listen to rumors if they aren't offering any help at all and listen to your instinct. Your instinct is a very important part of your own criticism and usually right. Its all I have to go on with critiques anyhow. Great job.
