Nothing is in DIRE need of addressing.
But here are some ideas.
We have several faces, but if there is an expression of which you could choose only one, make that the portrait. We have almost half the page is emotes of the character.
I thought 'waterskin' was pointing to the skin of the character it took me a moment to not be confused. I thought your character had 'water skin' and it was a scar of some kind that is why his skin is all red.---One of the things I always preach here is show us, dont tell us.
On that note, your character is as tall as Shaq! And the only reference we have for that is the 7'6" note. There may be a way to put a reference of something next to them to seam their actual height. But I didn't include that in the example sheet.
And maybe this is me being picky here, but I cannot tell what is happening in the bottom right.
----Moving on---
I read the Description, and it's interesting.
I can see the Elden flame and the shape of the character reflects a bit of a fire type of personality. However...
Consider yourself challenged. You have Expensive expressiveness, Dangerous to be intimidating and Comfortable for practicality BUT their true motivation is a scholar of the Arden Eld.
Expensive
Dangerous
Comfortable
Scholar
Another suggestion I often tote is to choose one of your traits over the other. Almost like a character creator part of a game, but instead of the size of body parts, its based on the ideas.
Say you have a hundred points to put into all four of those traits. All equal, they are boring, a little bit of everything kind of mish mashed. But if you push one of these sliders over a bit more and the others have to go down, now we are playing with an interesting shape design idea.
Some of the elements should be increased in their size for your page, to express their importance, the layout is very important. Not to mention the pyre explosion, smoke and Lance specials.
You can make a consistent layout for all your characters to make a collection for a campaign, or every one can be a piece of art. We dont have to have the description take front and center, and some of the things are really cool and I think they got crowded. I hope this helps you out. Let us know if you need help with the finished piece. Good luck!
